August 19, 2010

Je Te Manque, Mon Cher

Yes, more French for ya (thanks for the correction SKS).

I apologize for the lack of blog posts lately. Yesterday, I was in Denver with my good friend from school (also a dance major, yay!) to take some more pictures (I really need to build my bunch a little more so it's no longer a bunch but a whole freakin' lot). So that's partially why there was no post all day. Hopefully I got some winners (in the photos) and perhaps you will see one pop up for Photo de la Semaine this weekend (so keep an eye out!). I have also been rather occupied with Lost as well (as you know, if you read my previous post). I'm telling you, it's got me sucked in.

I want to say that another reason why I haven't been posting lately is because I'm. Stressing. Out.

For one thing (a big thing) is that my other half (Charles) is away for the weekend in wonderful Panama City, Florida while I'm stuck here all alone (actually, I chose to stay at my parents' house because I get all freaked out if I have to sleep in my apartment by myself...). He's there for specific reasons, and I was unfortunately unable to get (buy) a plane ticket (lack of money). Now, I know it's rather silly of me to be all sad and whatnot about it because it's only for four days. We went the entire school year last year by practically only seeing each other on weekends because we lived a little over an hour apart. But still. With both of us unemployed lately (sad, I know) we haven't really been away from each other for more than a few hours (aww, so precious).

It's like we're joined at the hip.

I miss him. A lot. Charles, if you're reading this (you better be reading this) then I want you to call me immediately after you have commented. I'll send you a reminder text message as well.

The other things I'm a little stressed over right now is the fact that school is starting again on Monday (holy shit) and I haven't danced at all or been in the greatest of shape over the summer. Plus, I'm beginning to have second thoughts...but I may have to just mention that in a post a little later down the road. Also, I'm worried about this not having a job and running out of money very quickly ordeal. Basically, I'm just scared. But I'm sure I'll figure it out and push past it once school starts and I'm busy doing things again (this is where the wonderful encouragement from you comes in, loyal readers).

Haha...This is not a normal blog for me, I apologize. You were probably like, "Ooh, a French title, this should be interesting". And then you got to reading it and didn't expect it to be about me bitching and whining about my poor little self, which is why you probably stopped reading it two paragraphs ago. That's OK. I won't take it personal. I just needed to write something, and this is what started to pour out of me. My emotions have literally filled to the brim and are now spilling over the top of it.

I do have a little project in mind that I will be working on over the weekend and display it on my blog for all to see. But I'm not telling you what it is yet. It's a surprise (everybody love surprises!). I will give you one hint (in a picture) and you will have to guess what it is. I'll check back with you tomorrow and supply you all with another little hint. I hope to be done with it on Saturday, so I'll keep you posted.

Hint #1:

Thanks for reading (for those of you who got all the way through it).
And now I give you a spur of the moment poem:

Running quiet
Breeze whispers
Grass clings
Sneakers snicker
The question remains.
Blankets spread
The squirrel will tread
Cotton flutters
The bird proclaims.
Knees knocking
Clouds blocking
Eyes locking
The question still remains.

Ok, that may not have been my best work, but I hope you can find your own meaning to it (you can tell me about it too if you'd like).

See you tomorrow friends!



  1. I can really empathize with the way you're feeling right now. I have always been a major worrier, and there are times when all of that worry and fear can just take you over. Don't worry, it will pass. I find that it really does help me when I make an effort to get outside of my own head (cuz let's face it, it's pretty crazy in there). Keep moving forward, you'll be just fine. :)

  2. Have faith that everything will be fine and it will! Big hugs, The Empress

  3. I use my blog to untangle all the stuff that chases around my head so I see no reason why you shouldn't. You are so talented, I am sure things will work out for you and I am sending you big hugs. Keep smiling, people will wonder what you have been up to :)

  4. Hang in there! Things will get better. ~ I loved your poem, too! :)

  5. I get all freaked out when I have to sleep alone too! I mean, we're talking like...sleep with the baseball bat under my bed freaking out. Not just like the occasional paranoid "What was that?" moment.

  6. Ha! love the post & the comments. Nice to see the bloggers are active and posting. My lady wont sleep alone as well I guess she isn't nearly as strange as I had previously suspected! Your poem flowed together really well good job. I am looking forward to these photographs. Also I noted you were in Denver.... woo (Go Avalanche).
    Photography - Music - Rants

  7. I was wondering if u were going w/him... He'll be back soon... and there will be other times u two can travel together.

  8. I distinctly remember stressing like a maniac in college...I think that's a good time to do it. But, trust me, every single thing will work out. It just does; even the worst stuff will clear up and you'll be fine. Especially if you have someone good by your side. Looking back, I wish I hadn't wasted so much time worrying. Every single decision I made led to other good ones. Now that I have a kid, I don't regret a thing, and when I don't know what to do, I go play Barbies with her. Just keepin' it real.

    Have a little fun, Jera! It will get better!

  9. No worries-I worry all the time too! And I use my blog to get rid of thoughts running around my head, you can too! You miss me, my dear? Heh, I think Je Te Manque might've been more appropriate...French classes, FTW.
    It'll be fine :] and smile, only a couple more days!

  10. Baby:

    In my life, the worrying is for naught. I do it anyway, but it is always unfounded.

    The flimsy reed of existence turns out to be the loving and powerful hand of an incomprehensible god. Every. Single. Time.

    I used to worry that I would never find you. But I did.

    Your next post will be about a brothel you want to open in which the theme is girls in dresses that span the entire spectrum of color in visible light.

    And I liked your poem.

    One million times, I love you.

  11. Hey little sister!

    Sounds like LOST should get lost. Throw that TV out the fucking window - it will save your life. xo

    big bro

  12. I just can't think of anything in response to your clue. I'm hoping it has at least SOMETHING to do with M & Ms. Partly because they are also rainbow colored, mostly because they are delicious.
    P.s The Canadian and I once spent 5 months apart due to visa issues. 4 days is easy-peasy.

  13. Candice: Thanks for the encouragement <3 I'm sure I'll be fine too, I just need to sort some things out.

    Ranters Box: Thanks! I'll take those big hugs <3

    Mynx: Thanks, and I'll take your big hugs too, haha. And I do tend to smile a lot around others <3

    Becky: Thanks! And thanks! I didn't think that poem would really be that great, so I'm glad some of you guys liked it <3

    Nicki: I hate those "what was that" moments. I just like my man's company :-)

    Christoph: Thanks so much! yeah, it's great to see all you guys commenting, I really didn't expect it :-) And yes, I live just under an hour away from Denver (woo! I don't watch sports...ha). And yes, pictures pictures pictures!

    Kalei's Best Friend: Yeah...I know...hopefully he can sell his book so I can finally read it (and so we can get rich) and I can get a photography business started here and then we could travel anywhere! <3

    Elizabeth: Hahaha, that made me smile, thanks :-) I know, everything has always worked out for me in the past even if it took a little while (it's just time for me to worry and re-evaluate things). And Barbies are awesome. So are dinosaurs. <3

    SKS: Thanks for the correction with the Francais. I clearly didn't think too hard about it whilst posting it in there. ha. And yes, blogs are good outlets :-)

    Charles: You brilliant love of mine. Thank you :-) I love you so so much. And yes, you're getting closer....(about the project) but not quite a brothel...sorry. And i'm glad you liked my poem :-)
    I can't wait to see you!!! <3

    Seth: Bro! I know....I know......

    Corianda: hahhaa. Well, sadly, it doesn't really have anything to do with M&Ms...sorry. I agree, they are quite delicious. And there is no way I could be away from my man for 5 whole months.

  14. I loved this poem! It made me feel the freedom of my past.
    Worry is one of the most useless habits and can be destructive at it's worst.
    This comes from living with a couple of World Class Worriers as you know.
    Faith is the cure. Faith in yourself, faith in the future & Faith in God.
    I would rather slam my thumb in the car door than admit to having watched even one episode of Friends, but to 'Get' Lost you have to watch to the end of the line. Anyway keep up the good blogs. I also love your Macro Shot of the needle. I know how hard they are to get right. You nailed it.


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